|Posted on September 6, 2019 at 3:20 PM|
“Your eye is a lamp that provides light for your body. When your eye is good, your whole body is filled with light. But when it is bad, your body is filled with darkness.” Luke 11:34
I once had eyes that could not see that the way I was living my life was dark indeed. I did things without a second thought as to who I was hurting even if I brought that harm upon myself it didn’t really matter to me because in the end I got what I wanted what I thought I could not live without.
My eye was bad and my body was filled with darkness just like he said it would be but interestingly not my whole body there were still some areas of light in me so I thought. I noticed the darkness in it but not all of it was bad there was a time or two the light shone but not enough times. The times I was polite held the door for the people behind me to go through.
Listened to others with the pure intent to counsel and comfort and even build some up. I found myself being kind and cordial to complete strangers so they wouldn’t see how dark I was. I said things like excuse me, please and thank you. I smiled a lot and acted as though I cared but the truth behind the mask I wore I was simply plotting my next move. Thinking of how I could use people to help me rise higher and higher. Building my relationship skills the world called it. How could this person work harder for me, how could I get more work out of this person, how can that person take me places I wanted to go, make me look good like I did it on my own. Who was willing and naive to do things for me things I could very well do on my own with hard work and perseverance but what fun is that when so many are so willing. Dark indeed were my thoughts.
And you know what is holding him back, for he can be revealed only when his time comes. For this lawlessness is already at work secretly, and it will remain secret until the one holding it back steps out of the way. 2 Thessalonians 2:6
A friend once described the darkness as something like Pandoras box, a chest inside my mind of the wickedness done to me, maybe something I saw on TV, heard on the news, a song I heard repeatedly on the radio, or read in an article. All the darkness in the world shoved inside this box and one day whatever was holding it back steps aside and the lock unlocks and the darkness seeps out into my thinking like a slow fog. For no reason what so ever I could be driving by a park, see people walking and the darkness finds its way into to the forefront of my mind like a movie screen. And before I know it, death is the result. Darkness attacks without warning. Everyone is slaughtered. One day here and gone without so much as a kiss goodbye.
Judgement was the first thought that came to my mind, comments like what people were doing, wearing, how much they weighed, the stero types, racial profiling, nothing was ever good, no blessings to give, no gratitude for the things I had that others were without. And I thought I was a good person, one of the good ones in this world just because I would never but that isn’t to say I hadn’t thought of it before.
Make sure that the light you think you have is not actually darkness. Luke 11:35
Darkness in disguise. I thought I was good most of the time or at least that is what I wanted people to think I was but the things I thought were not good. The things I said in private were not things I would share in public. The shameful things I did behind closed doors were not things I wanted to be seen in the light. The things I allowed my eyes to see over and over again in private that conditioned me to think a certain way believe a certain belief those were not things I wanted people to see. In the light people saw my smile, they saw I was polite and kind, they saw I was a good listener, they saw the person that wouldn’t harm a fly. But in darkness behind these blind eyes my cunning motives were revealed, in my thinking that went straight from hell itself Genesis 6:5. Till the day I fixed my eyes on things I had not seen before.
Satan, who is the god of this world, has blinded the minds of those who don’t believe. They are unable to see the glorious light of the Good News. They don’t understand this message about the glory of Christ, who is the exact likeness of God. 2 Corinthians 4:4
Like scales that fell from my eyes the more I shut out the world and what the world would have me learn and exchanged that time to spend more time in His Word the more He made me to understand that my ways were dark, my thoughts were not of the light, my path was crooked, and the way I lived my life would only result in one successful thing and it had nothing to do with the things I was after.
As my brother explained in John 5:29 “Those who have done good will rise to experience eternal life, and those who have continued in evil will rise to experience judgement.” For the first time I realized just because I thought I was good did not mean I had “done good” any good I did was always for an ulterior motive for my benefit, not the benefit of anyone but me. The year I gave my life to Christ I did one intentional good thing for every year of my life. I couldn’t make up for all that wasted time living in the dark but I could start by doing just one thing that would benefit someone else for the first time without seeking a reward.
If you are filled with light, with no dark corners, then your whole life will be radiant, as though a floodlight were filling you with light.” Luke 11:36
Instead of looking at people with judgement in my eyes I began to bless them. If my mind had the power to curse it also had the power to bless, to honor, to give praise and gratitude but it didn’t come naturally. Not like my brother who was the exact likeness of our Father. I had to be intentional about my thoughts. Pandora’s box was still open and the world filled it daily with news and media sources but for the first time I was given power to take my thoughts captive and teach them to obey Christ 2 Corinthians 10:5. The moment the sound of the movie reel fired up I changed the script. Instead of torment, disastrous plots, terrifying chain of events and shameful acts I did what my Father would do, I surrounded the helpless with an army of protection, I gave the weak strength, I lifted the heads of those weighed down by the heavy burdens this world would put on them and turned them into people who walked with their heads held high, I broke the chains that kept people prisoner to their sins and placed them on the enemy they belong to reminding Satan and all his minions that his time is up, no more would he deceive me with his lies. Revelation 20:1-2
Still later he appeared to the eleven disciples as they were eating together. He rebuked them for their stubborn unbelief because they refused to believe those who had seen him after he had been raised from the dead. Mark 16:14
*Footnote reads “And they excused themselves, saying, “This age of lawlessness and unbelief is under Satan, who does not permit God’s truth and power to conquer the evil spirits. Therefore, reveal your justice now.” This is what they said to Christ. And Christ replied to them, “The period of years of Satan’s power has been fulfilled, but other dreadful things will happen soon. And I was handed over to death for those who have sinned, so that they may return to the truth and sin no more, and so they may inherit the spiritual, incorruptible, and righteous glory in heaven.”